Latest Acquisitions

Here are the latest additions to the apartment, thanks to a couple of preliminary birthday gifts:

I can now stay warm in a lit up living room, and can flip my grilled cheese with something besides a knife. A rather controversial item was added, as well:

I suppose I won't lose too much time having it if I only use it for movies. If I get cable or DVR, I'd be done for.

Stay tuned for further purchases. Another lamp? A couch? A desk? A futon, perhaps? Only Craig knows...

3-Way Collision

I had a strange enough dream that I actually still remember it the next day. Mostly. Usually it's my typical end of the world or the US being invaded by another country - hopefully not prophetic - with me hiding in culverts or swimming through black water to get to an orange shore. All the more puzzling: those dreams are recurring. But last night, I dreamt that I had to redo high school as a 26 year old. One of my college profs was the school bus driver, and I had a flashback in the dream of exploring the town and guessing which high school I thought I was going to go to and then finding out I was right. And then in my dream I found out I had sleep apnea. Yeah, a little odd. I think I'm still recovering from that mixture of work, high school, and college.

Really?! A student?!

Going to the movies the other night, I was lamenting the fact that I was going to the late show rather than the matinee. Yeah I know, who cares: 2 dollars. But hey, that's a whole load of laundry, right there.

I wasn't paying much attention, and was working my way to my seat, when I glanced at my ticket. I made it through two checkpoints with a student ticket. They never even asked, they just assumed?! Sweet, a birthday present a month in advance! I didn't think I looked that young.

Crickets in Springfield

So we had a surprise visit from the fire marshal the other day at work. We asked him for identification, and he jokingly said he didn't think he needed any since he was a terrorist. So my coworker replies (jokingly, mind you) with the suggestion that he pick up his anthrax in the back. All goes silent for about 5 seconds--you could hear the proverbial crickets--and he says "What?" in a low, dangerous tone. So, we say again, hesitantly, that if he was a terrorist (nervous half-laugh added at this point) that we had the anthrax he ordered in the back. Crickets again. And then he just moves on to the next subject as if nothing happened.

?!?!?!

I can't remember exactly what the second incident was, but that time it was crickets on our end because we didn't know how to react. We still don't know whether he was joking or not. If I remember the particulars later, I'll add them in. At least we passed the inspection... I guess that's the important thing. He wasn't anything like Fire Marshal Bill. Could it be that Jim Carey was not portraying the typical fire marshal?

Sleep Depravation, Adrenaline Crash, or Stage 2 Insanity?

Due to my sense of humor's specialization in self-deprecation, I just couldn't resist sharing: I ran into the same corner last night: twice. I went to go down the hall and just turned too sharp or overcorrected. I don't really know. Yikes. I'm going to go to bed early again tonight, just in case. Then if it keeps happening I can rule out one of the possibilities. Anyone selling padded walls on craigslist???

Accidental Self-Pun

It appears as if I'm losing my inner monologue.

This morning, as I was getting ready for work, I went to grab a banana and encountered a
problem:

"That's funny," I said to myself aloud, "I've never had a banana split before." By the time I finished packing my lunch I laughed out loud ... to myself ... at the joke I just played ... on myself. My hope is that I progress through this phase of insanity quickly and move on to that more blissful place where I no longer realize I'm crazy.

Just Don't Lick the Walls!

Other than the fact that there may be lead in some of the oldest layers of paint and a few hints of remnants from the 70's in the apartment (both of which I find amusing), I have enjoyed my new apartment. With internet at home, I'll probably begin a casual craigslist hunt for good deals to add to the furniture collection.

Today, I helped a random person get some furniture upstairs that she picked up at a garage sale. She said of the many apartments she's seen in running routes around here, these are some of the nicest. I figure I can take her word for it. After all, she does work for UPS. Anyone else need help moving? People just seem to find me. Guess I'm good at it ...